My 57 Year Old Breasts

One of my patients wrote this, so I’m posting it as a guest blog. Thank you, Gail.

Here’s to the journey:

If you wait long enough you surely lose your motivation. Or do you? For thirty-seven years I waited to ‘fix’ the breasts I lost in pregnancy. Now that I’m fifty-seven years old; it hardly seems worth it. After all, I am gray, getting wrinkled, and feeling a bit creaky in my joints. Why on earth would I need to get breast implants? On the other hand, I do seem to bring it up a lot – the fact that I used to have gorgeous breasts and I miss having them. Every woman I’ve had more than a few conversations with has heard my sad refrain. I was humiliated when my two teenage daughters (daughters are so kind to their moms), made fun of my breasts, even as theirs were developing perfectly. They named theirs, as they were developing, peanuts for the younger one and watermelons for my eldest. I was sneakers, as in old and worn-out, and I was only in my mid-thirties at the time. A few short months ago, my eldest, now in her mid-thirties snapped at me, “You have been talking about the breasts you used to have since I was born. Either do something about it or Shut Up!”

And so I did – something about it. I knew I couldn’t ever shut up about something that had bothered me for so long, so I made an appointment with a plastic surgeon to see about my breasts for the fourth time in over thirty years. This time I signed on the dotted line. Thirty-eight years ago I gave birth to the first of my two daughters. I was nineteen and totally naïve. Young, athletic and thin, none of my friends had trod down this pregnancy path before me so I knew nothing and my mom kept mum, for some unknown reason. I was idealistic and head-strong and although my husband was still in college, I was ready for my babies.

My breasts nearly exploded during my pregnancy, from a firm 34-C to a gigantic 36-DD plus. I borrowed my mom’s bras during my pregnancy because I couldn’t afford new ones and I came out the top of her 36-DD’s. My husband’s college buddies called me ‘tits-on-a-stick”. I nursed my newborn daughter and slept on a pile of towels to absorb the extra milk. My doctor said I could have been a wet nurse, in the old days, I was so prolific. Once I stopped nursing my breasts went down, down, down to barely fill out a B cup. My husband, now my ex, looked at me and said, “What do we do now”. I burst into tears and have never forgotten.

When I was 27 I divorced the father of my children and went to work, finished my education, and raised my children, as a very single parent; no help, no child support. We were very young and I made a decision, not to save for retirement nor spend significant sums of money on myself. There was time for that when I got older, once my children left home and finished college.

But my sagging breasts nagged at me. In a gym locker room over twenty years ago I noticed a woman, older than myself, with the most gorgeous, perky breasts, just like the ones I had for about 4 years (easy come, easy go, I thought). “Can I say something personal”, I asked, embarrassed to be looking at a naked stranger. “You have the most gorgeous breasts.” “They aren’t my original ones”, she said. ”I was too flat so I did something about it. Beautiful, aren’t they?” Happy for her, but envious, the image remains in my mind to this day.

At thirty-three I made an appointment with a plastic surgeon in Massachusetts. “You are a classic”, he said. “You lost a significant amount of breast tissue during children-bearing and now you sag”. At that time, the potential side effects scared me. I could have problems as I got older. Anyhow I couldn’t afford it. And then, yet again, in my forties, I visited a plastic surgeon in Maryland who wanted to give me very large breasts. I ran. Like Goldilocks, I was looking for the perfect situation.

I am now semi-retired, in other words, I took a pay cut to work a less stressful job to live in my dream location – Santa Fe, New Mexico. I can’t afford to pay my mortgage so I have a roommate. One of my roommates had to get emergency plastic surgery for a cut on her forehead. She just loved her surgeon, a Dr. Daniel Ronel. And once, again – having waited another fifteen years, I decided to get a free consultation. But this time, the stars had aligned. My warm, talkative surgeon (who used to be a Pediatrician and has that compassionate character) said that I looked terrific, but that I could be much more. He complimented my fit and trim body, given my advanced age, of course. And then … he had a cancellation. Could I come back in 5 days? Could I take three days off of work? It was now or never. When would I ever do this if not now? When I am over 60? If I decided No, then it was No, in this life anyway. I said “yes”.

Then, the beginning of a long internal conversation. I am nearly fifty-eight and I have been lucky enough to have kept myself in shape. I have long ago accepted my physical flaws and the aging of my skin. I now have arthritis, high cholesterol, and osteoporosis. I am also a proud grandma. My boyfriend of ten years says he likes my breasts just the way they are. And I still can’t afford this. This will add to my already burgeoning credit card. Now or never. Now or never. A young single mom, in her twenties, works at the surgeon’s as a secretary. She did it, for the same reason and she couldn’t afford it either. My own daughter, now a surgeon, had her breasts reduced when she was twenty and she just took out a loan. I have been conservative with money all my life.

I go for it. I am now one month post-surgery. It is surgery and it has been painful. I am over the initial pain and I now have the breasts that I once had, well as nearly as I can recall. One part of my body is not only unwrinkled, but is exceptionally beautiful. My boyfriend called me ‘luscious’ — now that’s a word I haven’t heard in along time. My sarcastic self calls them my ‘bionic boobs’ as they will surely survive me and my soon to get old body. My daughters will make fun of me and I am anxious about telling my daughter who has two children of her own that I have breasts that are perkier than hers. But I am back to a small 34-C, exactly what I asked for. I consider it a ‘reconstruction’ more than an enhancement. I got back what I lost. My surgeon is a miracle-maker.

I am just now beginning to buy some low cut blouses and show off my new-found youth. I am proud to have given myself this gift. It’s a new start, yet again.

By Gail Rae

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Who is getting plastic surgery?

Before Face, Neck and Browlift

After Face, Neck and Browlift

Those getting plastic surgery are not who you think they are. They’re not doing it for the reasons you might think. Since 2000, the number of cosmetic procedures performed in the United States has increased by almost 50% percent.

There were almost 10 million surgical and nonsurgical cosmetic procedures performed in the United States in 2009, as reported by the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery (ASAPS). Surgical procedures accounted for 15% of the total with nonsurgical procedures making up 85% of the total.

The top five cosmetic surgical procedures in 2009 were:

• Breast augmentation (311,957 procedures)
• Liposuction (283,735procedures)
• Eyelid surgery (149,943 procedures)
• Rhinoplasty (138,258 procedures)
• Abdominoplasty (127,923 procedures).

Women had over 9 million cosmetic procedures, over 90% percent of the total. The number of cosmetic procedures for women decreased over 3 percent from 2008, likely due to the poor economy.

The top five surgical procedures for women were:

• Breast augmentation
• Liposuction
• Eyelid surgery
• Abdominoplasty
• Breast reduction

Men had over 900,000 cosmetic procedures, over 9 percent of the total. The number of cosmetic procedures for men actually increased over 8 percent from 2008.

The top five surgical procedures for men were:

• Liposuction
• Rhinoplasty
• Eyelid surgery
• Breast reduction to treat enlarged male breasts
• Hair transplantation

So, what are some of the reasons why? Here are excerpts from some emails I have received from patients:
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“I’ve had 2 kids and I breastfed them both. I’ve been dieting, I go to the gym, and have even been using a personal trainer to tighten my abs. I just can’t get rid of the “baby fat” across my tummy and my breasts are too saggy. Help!”

The number of “mommy makeovers” is increasing: in this day and age, women are giving birth later, returning to their careers sooner, and have busier schedules than ever before. Many are finding cosmetic plastic surgery to be the answer to returning to a pre-pregnancy shape they are comfortable with. The “mommy makeover” procedures include breast augmentation, tummy tuck and breast lift. In fact, for the first time, breast augmentation has become the most popular plastic surgical procedure, followed by nose reshaping.
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“I’m 45 years old and was let go 6 months ago by my accounting firm. I’ve been going to job interviews but I am competing with men 10 years younger. Do you think a facelift will help?”

The reality is that our workplace society favors a more youthful look – those who look younger and fitter are generally more highly paid, etc etc

Baby boomers (44 – 61 years of age): as a group they are experiencing the loss of skin elasticity with age, and so the number of body lifting procedures, targeting the thighs, lower body, breasts, upper arms, and face, has increased significantly.

In the past year, men have typically looked to revitalize their aging faces with injectable fillers. In contrast to these minimally invasive procedures, they were also looking to tone their bodies with surgery, including tummy tucks, thigh lifts, and breast reduction procedures.

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Isn’t it vain to have plastic surgery?

The Latin origin of the word, “vanity” is vanus, meaning, “empty, without substance.” This does not apply to most people seeking plastic surgery. The typical patient either wants to refresh their appearance, to look as they did in years past, or to enhance their body to a state that corresponds to their image of themselves. An increase in self-esteem occurs, and rarely crosses the line into an excessive feeling of attractiveness or of one’s abilities. The increased self-confidence is profound and has many positive repercussions.

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Isn’t plastic surgery for the rich?

No longer! The relative cost of plastic surgery has decreased and has become available to a much larger segment of the population. There are financing plans available much like those for buying automobiles or appliances. Even some managed care insurance plans offer cosmetic surgery to their participants in a limited fashion. 48% of Americans with an income under $25K approve of plastic surgery according to the survey and would have a procedure done.

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How can people afford it?

Although some patients save up the entire cost of their plastic surgery, many are turning to finance companies that will lend them the money, often at reasonable rates. Financing provides the opportunity to have the surgery without having to wait — for many patients, the plastic surgery loan is just another bill, a way to build up frequent-flier miles if they put it on a credit card, or another check to write once a month.

My patients have included teachers, truck drivers, retirees, ranchers, and school-bus drivers.

Questions?

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Is Heidi Montag really thinking about reversing?

The latest rumor is that Heidi Montag is considering reversing some of the plastic surgery procedures she recently had done. Of course some of the work can’t really be “undone.” My guess is she’ll be having a reduction of the size of her implants, but I really have no idea. Why am I talking about this?

She apparently did some of the procedures to please her husband, from whom she is recently separated. If he truly was the one who pushing for the surgeries, now that he’s somewhat out of the picture, she may have had some quiet time to think about things.

I want to talk about this for a minute. I want to talk about decisions we sometimes make in the hope to please someone else. We’ve all done it, men and women. I’m sure there are people all over the globe who have had plastic surgery to please a spouse or partner. If these people are 100 percent in themselves, and aware of what they are doing, and their motivations, than that’s great. However, if someone (perhaps even you) is “iffy” about something, then going into plastic surgery is not something I would recommend. It is your body. Your decision on what you’re going to do or not do with your body should be completely respected. I just think if you are going to have a plastic surgery procedure, it really does need to be about you.

Back to Montag, I’m sure she is going through a great deal with a new separation. It won’t be a big deal to reduce the size of her breasts. Women do it all the time. What’s important is that from here on out is that she’s doing it for herself.

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Breast reduction in teens and adults

I wrote a blog post back in March on teens and breast augmentation. When I wrote it, I was writing it from a small to large perspective. Well, what if it’s the other way around? What if your teenager hates her breasts because she thinks they’re too big. What if they’re also causing painful, physical symptoms?

It’s not uncommon to see teenagers with bigger breasts than those of teens from decades ago. I definitely feel that puberty can be accelerated by some of the foods we eat. It’s also not uncommon to see bigger breasts on bigger teenagers. Perhaps the obesity epidemic in the US could be part of the cause. However, regardless of what led to the issue, a solution needs to be found.

It’s already a stressful enough time for a teenager as they enter high school. For a teen with extremely large breasts, this could play a dramatic role on how she feels about herself, which in turn, could affect other areas of her life. Having been a pediatrician, I’ve seen teens experience rebellion and even depression over this issue.

I’ve also spoken with parents who have had concerns about sexual promiscuity and wondered whether having the surgery would lead to that due to emphasis on the breasts. In my experience, this has never been an issue. The heart of the matter is how the teenager feels emotionally and physically.

When I work with parents and teens in breast reduction cases, we go about the Whole Being Plan in the same manner as adult patients; incorporating psychotherapy to help both parties deal with the concerns or fears they have about the surgery. So far, it’s been highly successful. Patient symptoms prior to surgery such as lower back pain, shoulder pain, numbness in the fingers, and grooves in the shoulder are usually relieved by the procedure. Even more important is relief of the social awkwardness caused by having a large chest.

If you have a teen that has been experiencing any of these issues and have any questions, let me know. The same applies to adults. This certainly isn’t just a teen issue. It’s always good to know there are options out there.

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